


Punkissed

by xButtons



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: AU, Eventual Smut, Just Kiss Him, M/M, Punk AU, Sexual Tension, izaya is such a tease, lots of coffee drinking, shizuo with piercings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-06
Updated: 2016-07-15
Packaged: 2018-06-06 15:55:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6760393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xButtons/pseuds/xButtons
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shizuo and Izaya become roommates after he gets let out of jail for vandalism. Izaya uses this opportunity to pick on him even more than he usually does. Stolen glances lead to some weird behavior on both parties.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pinapple Express

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Izaya sighed through the phone. The new roommate would be there in at least 30 minutes. He agreed to Shizuo Heiwajima to be his new roommate, this was a new low for him; if there ever was one. Apparently his nemesis was also a recent prisoner and was still confused as to why he didn’t ask Shinra first.

 _What the hell am I doing?_ He glided his tongue ring across the back of his front teeth then got off the couch. Work was slow, even though he’s on call all the time.

Anticipation riddled through, even though it was just Shizuo. The last time they saw each other was a few months before, and he finally was caught by the cops. They weren’t letting him off the hook anymore apparently.

Hopefully, he doesn’t revert to throwing appliances instead of signs and vending machines. _It’s one thing to see him every once in a while I'm out, but every day??_

Before he knew it, the doorbell rang. “It’s unlocked.” He followed with a gulp of coffee. Shizuo slid his bags in before him and pulled more of his stuff after him.

Izaya didn’t know whether to help him or sit back and watch the beast like he was in a national geographic documentary. That would be a good idea. He hid a small chuckle in his coffee cup. A whole channel full of the behavior of a humanoid beast living a modern life. He guessed he could make a few extra bucks off of it, of course giving a cut to the star himself to save his ass.

“What the hell are you looking at flea?”

“The star of the show.” He couldn’t help but snicker.

“Are you seriously starting with me right now?”

At this point, Shizuo was gritting his teeth in order to keep himself from shoving that asshole’s head in the microwave.

“Ah, sorry Shizu-chan, I forg-“

“Just shut up for a second, won’t you? I haven’t even been here 20 minutes yet.”

Izaya blinked but nodded in compliance. He’s probably going to have to sleep with an eye open, depending on how much his rival wanted to get thrown back in a cell.

“Almost forgot, room’s that way.” He pointed with his thumb, looking down at the screen of his phone. “it’s the one at the end.”

For the next 30 minutes, there was silence except for occasional muttering and shuffling around.

“Need any help in there?”

Shizuo huffed a short “no” and finished unloading a few boxes. Izaya decided to fill the silent tension with the news and picked up his soda can from the coffee table. The can was still cold when he held it to his mouth; he finished the rest and placed it down.

“Hey Shizu-chan-” Izaya made his way to the doorway down the hallway. He was stopped short by Shizuo.

“What.” He glared down at his new roommate. “Just leave me alone right now, flea.”

Izaya rolled his eyes, “Do you want pineapple on the pizza?”

The roommates stared at one another while Shizuo was trying to process the question.

“Well?” Izaya grinned after a few minutes.

“Who the fuck puts pineapple on a pizza?”

“Yes or no?”

“No. I’m not hungry anyway.” And with that moment, Izaya was met with the door in his face. At least he was trying to cooperate with the beast, which says a lot considering how often he spends his free time plotting on how to piss him off next; which is what he did thirty minutes later, while he ate almost the whole pizza himself, picking off the pineapples and putting them on the last two slices.

Finally, his phone rang. He fought with the grease while trying to pick it up, and getting it all over the screen, then his face.

“Yeah?” he answered and ripped a paper towel off the roll on the counter. It was a client asking about some business. Izaya had thought he should give this job up before and do something else, but it was fun blackmailing people as a living. People paid so much money to get dirt on their enemies it was hilarious.

A sudden thump came from down the hallway, followed by a loud growl. Izaya flinched. _Jeeeeez._

“I’m incredibly sorry, I have to check on my roommate, he’s getting into things like a dog. I’ll call you right back.” Izaya apologized and clicked end call. He took a big breath before he set out for the end of the hallway and banged on his door.

“What!?” yelled the voice from the other side followed by another crash.

“What the fuck are you doing in there?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Izaya opened the door to Shizuo trying to shove everything he owned into the smallest closet possible. He rolled his eyes, keeping back a scream himself.

“Shizu-chan…” Shizuo glared at his new roommate in response. “you should’ve unboxed it first, maybe it would’ve fit?”

“I know what I’m doing.” He proceeded to stuff another box on the top rack, only for it to fall back over onto his head. Izaya couldn’t help but laugh this time. The sight of this man-child was just too much, he had to step out of the room to keep his composure.

“Riightt…” he said while he walked back in. “I have an extra futon and blankets. Why don’t you just wait until later to destroy the place when I’m at work.”

Before Shizuo could say anything, Izaya was already pulling a futon out of the closet in the hallway to the room. This was probably one of the most generous and least annoying things this “thing” has ever done for him. He’s offered a room AND a bed on the same day, maybe with some hesitation, but Shizuo could care less right now because he needed sleep.

He watched his roommate spread the futon out on the floor, pushing excess boxes towards him. Izaya caught him staring and stopped. He assumed another smart-ass comment was about to be launched out of his stupid mouth, so he left the room to get the last bag of useless stuff near the front door.

Right before he stepped foot back into the room, the building shook. _Great. I hope he isn’t scared of thunder too._ Izaya looked up at the approaching beast, pushing himself back up to grab a pillow out of the closet that was slowly collecting useless shit, throwing it at him.

“Here.” And his stupid face was smiling again. Shizuo dropped the bag to catch the pillow before it hit his face.

“Was that fucking necessary Izaya?” a hint of exhaustion coated his words. He didn’t feel like rampaging; he did that enough earlier.

“Of course, it was. Can you make the rest of your bed yourself? I’ve got stuff to do.”

It was getting dark and the storm was moving at a steady pace. _What could he possibly have to do? Who the hell knows._ Shizuo grumbled and walked passed him, throwing his pillow near the front of the mattress, plopping himself down and watching Izaya leave the room.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. The little shit and the beast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the midst of settling into his new aggravating life with the worst person ever, Shizuo was about to become a headline thanks to Erika.

The next few days were surprisingly quiet. Izaya decided to get another piercing but didn’t know where. He already has a handful on his head, two on each lobe, tongue, and two on his left eyebrow. he opted for the collarbones.

“I’ll be back in an hour or so Shizu-chan.” He was already halfway out the door when Shizuo came out of the bathroom drying his newly dyed hair.

“Where?”

Izaya blinked at the stupidly attractive sight, then mentally kicked himself back to reality.

“Piercings.” Was the only thing he replied before closing the door behind him.

Before he could sit down, Shizuo’s phone started going off with some Moe-girl anime ringtone. It was Tom, the only person he could actually rely on to not piss him off at all besides Shinra and Celty. He only called to ask about helping him catch another goon lurking around the city, half wondering if he knew this idiot he was talking about. Luckily it wasn’t his bastard roommate, but some junkie shoplifting condoms and other weird shit. _Why couldn’t the police take this one on though?_ The water on his brow was soaking up in his skin, but the smell of hair dye still reeked through the living room.

“So, you wanna go?”

He took a while to reply because he hadn’t gotten this much tranquility for months. Reluctantly, he agreed and stood up to get a shirt on and his shoes. Maybe after yesterday’s case, this will be a breeze. It was nice to get out of the apartment, he was hoping he was still out while Izaya got back.

Verona and Tom met him in the parking lot. Tom’s dreads were pulled up this time and it looked like he acquired another piercing as well.

“Well, ready?”

They all hopped in Tom’s Prius, Verona making Shizuo sit in the back, and headed off towards the convenience store. As much as he wanted to gripe about his knees being smashed up to his chest almost, he knew not to cross his coworker. She was bad as fuck, and it didn’t help that she was also Russian.

As they were pulling up to the convenience store, the police approached them and tom opened his window.

“Tom Tanaka?” the officer asked looking over his sunglasses.

“Yessir.” He answered while he pulled out his wallet, showing the officer his license. The officer took a quick glance and prompted them to get out of the car to show them the evidence. It was mostly just footprints and generic stuff then showed them the surveillance tape. The thief was pudgy and wearing a purple hoodie with sagging jeans. He looked like he stunk of alcohol, which led Shizuo to believe that’s why he was stealing that shit in the first place.

They began to scour the area, agreeing to split up to look for a dirty deadbeat in a purple sweater, one of the easiest cases to catch in a while. He decided to check around the subway station, thinking that was the smartest idea for a crook trying to escape. He’s found Izaya here before trying to run from his wrath, this was no different; although, the condom thief wasn’t instigating and was in for a real treat.

Shizuo played with his earing, ignoring the hopeful stares of girls also waiting for the subway. He hated how much he looked like his brother, because of this. He never really paid any attention to dating because he felt it was a waste of time, but also because he was horrible with expressing his feelings, aka throwing shit around because someone didn’t know how to keep their opinions to themselves. He was kind of afraid to date in all honesty now that he thought about it, he didn’t want to hurt anybody. When the subway came, he boarded the last train and was smashed against a group of college age kids.

~

The pain didn’t bother Izaya as much as the other customers before him, in fact, he practically enjoyed it. Two small, shiny studs surrounded by red skin framed his collar bones.

“Well? you like them?” his piercer inquired. He looked over his shoulder at her and her fiery red hair before he nodded.

“Yeah, maybe I’ll see you next week?” he winked before walking up to the counter to pay. She nodded and rang him up then handed him his receipt.

Right as he turned the corner, a fat, pork like man ran passed him with a handful of bags. Following him were handfuls of cops and that girl that’s been hanging around Shizuo lately. He couldn’t bring himself to accept the fact that he _may_ or _may not_ be a little bit jealous. She obviously didn’t care too much for him and he’s so oblivious to flirtatious shit it doesn’t even matter.

He let out a minuscule snicker before crossing the crosswalk to the other side to follow them. _And I thought today would be boring._

And the games were begun. Several officers tackled the guy, snatching the bag and prompting the contents to spew out all over the sidewalk including a box of condoms and several energy drinks. Man, was this guy lucky the cops got to him before Shizuo Heiwajima got to him, at least he’s still able to walk, even after being shoved in a car. The people who were taking snap chats quickly disbursed after the car drove away, laughing at the prospect of him stealing a 1000-yen box when he’s obviously spending the night to himself.

~

Panting, Tom phoned up Shizuo to tell him they’re back on call because Verona caught him but also asked him out to coffee for the trouble. Shizuo immediately accepted and headed over to their usual coffee house.

“Ahh, Shizuo…” Shizuo sat down across from him. The server made his way over to the table and took their order. They continued to talk about their weird cases while they waited, including a woman kidnapping a male model while in a hotdog suit and even mafia-like gangs that showed up after the dollars, only to piss themselves knowing their rival was impervious to bullets and other acts of violence.

Out of the corner of his eye, Shizuo saw his roommate skipping across the crosswalk ahead of the other pedestrians and hoped he wouldn’t come inside. Nope, he was wrong. _Here comes the worst person ever ready to ruin my time off_. He grimaced at the bell above the door ringing, tried to keep his cool and not break the glass in his hand.

“You alright?” Tom blinked and put his own cup of coffee down. Without saying anything, Shizuo looked over at the front counter then back at Tom. His friend rose an eyebrow out of confusion and Shizuo continued to side-eye the Flea until he sat down at the table nearest the front.

“Hey isn’t that-“

“Shhhh…” Shizuo cut him off. But before he knew it, they acquired a new lunch date.

“Coincidence to see you here, isn’t it Shizu-chan?” He remarked, scooping whipped cream out of his mocha with a straw.

Tom looked back at Shizuo for an answer but just received a glare himself. Izaya leaned forward to include himself in the staring contest.

“Aw, am I interrupting something?” he pouted and licked some of the whipped cream that covered one of his tattoos on his left hand.

 Shizuo clenched his jaw and tried not to watch him licking whipped cream off his hand. Why did it fluster him so much? Out of all the times, he’s been around, this has never happened. It didn’t help that Tom was staring right at him because he didn’t know how to handle it either, and he knew how troublesome Izaya was, especially having to bail him out if Izaya framed his friend for stupid shit.

“I’ll, uh, go get some napkins.” Tom wanted to escape the tension in case a table decided to high five him in the face.

“And, I’ll come with you.” Followed Shizuo, which left Izaya to sit by himself again. This prompted him to eavesdrop while pretending to check the message boards on his phone.

“What does he want? Did he finally lose his mind?” Tom whispered while pulling out napkins he’s not gonna need out of the dispenser.

Shizuo paused, letting out a sigh and tried to come up with a way to describe his situation the best he could. “He’s my roommate now and he’s making sure to rub it in my face as much as possible.”

“Ouch. Ever since you got released?”

The blond nodded in disappointment. Although maybe it wasn’t so bad, considering he hasn’t tried to kill him lately.

Back at the table, Izaya slid down his chair a bit in boredom because his coffee dates left him to gossip about him over napkins and clear straws. It wasn’t too long after that he received another business call from a girl asking about a boy she liked. Sometimes he wished he could post rules on what not to ask him, even though his job was considered slimy.

“I need his name unless you don’t know? It’s really creepy to stalk random people isn’t it?” he grinned at the girl trying to justify herself over the phone. This was the best part, making people feel like shit. He was destined to do this his whole pathetic life. Shizuo and his friend came back with an unusual amount of napkins to try to mask te gossip.

“It doesn’t matter, just give me a detailed description of him, as a matter of fact, why don’t you follow him around and get a good look at him while you’re at it.-“

“Izaya.” He heard Shizuo in his free ear, along with some annoying hot breath.

“You’ll have to call me back later.” He rolled his eyes and ended the call while he turned his head to glare at him in response. The distance between them was almost nonexistent. The tension surrounding the two rivals was making Tom severely more uncomfortable than he already was the whole time. “What?” Izaya sneered his answer back.

And through the grit of his teeth, Shizuo tried with every ounce of his being not to shove his smug little ass to the floor. Instead, he took a short breath.

“Why don’t you take yourself outside if you’re gonna manipulate yet another innocent girl into insanity.”

“Pfft, Shizu-chan’s really hilarious.” He glanced down then back up to stare right into his soul.

With that, the distance became shorter. Tom groaned and slumped back into his chair, half tempted to just leave. A few customers watched, including Erika who was viciously snap chatting her discovery to Walker and her online fans.

“See!! I told you, Walker!!”

Shizuo scoffed and grabbed his sweating iced coffee off the table while he motioned Tom to follow him out the door. He wasn’t going to deal with this shit today. _Not today satan, not today…_ He half expected the little shit to try to make a move on him, especially in public.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I'm super sorry about the late update, the stress of trying to find a job and figuring out school has made my writers block worse. 
> 
> I think I might have an idea where I want this to go, I'm actually thinking about plotlines this time although I don't know how many chapters there's gonna be because this is basically a collab/roleplay between my Shizuo and I.

**Author's Note:**

> This is an AU one of my friends and I made up. most of the universe is still the same besides some minor changes. (I know I have other stories to write but I really wanted to start this one;;) Also if there are any grammatical errors, I'd like to know.


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